with light brown streaks (girlhatesself) wrote,
with light brown streaks

this is the reason why i hide

I really like my new job, that makes me happy. I don't think I'm ever going to work at a corporate restaurant ever again. FUCK Ruby Tuesday! Sneaky Pete's just reminds me of the place I worked at when I was 14. It feels more like home. I love it.

I had trouble convincing myself to fall asleep which means I had trouble waking up. I laid in bed with my legs hanging off onto the floor for like 10 minutes. Just couldn't get all the way out. I hate that shit. I do like working day though. Getting home at 2 is nice.

Ryan bought me this stuffed penguin when he was at Sea World last weekend. I named it Steve because Ryan looks like Steve from Blue's Clue's. He's fucking cute. I slept with him last night (the penguin not Ryan).

Sometimes I think I should leave Dave for someone younger. It's not even that I really want to. I just feel like an 18 year old and a 30 year old shouldn't be together. Like he's keeping me from being a kid and I'm keeping him from being an adult...or something. I don't know. I do miss having a boyfriend my age sometimes. Staying out all night and causing mischief. But Dave makes me happy...fuck I don't know. I love the man, what can I say? He's fucking great. I'm happy/lucky to have him. But that doesn't mean I'm not going to think about what it was like to have a boyfriend I could be a child with.

I'm really tired today. I ate breakfast for once. One egg over medium and a couple slices of wheat toast. Good girl.

Someone's calling. I don't answer phones here. It's not my cell it's not my problem.

I'm blind.
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